Shonan Knife Wombats

by Ken Oiwa

After two innings that did not go to 20 overs in T20 match against Shonan at YCAC, it was few beers in the clubhouse welcoming the new guys to the club (Fahd, Pramod, Satyam, Malith), with Fahd struggling to pour a pint with 99% head with 1% beer in a glass……

Wombats Innings – 56 All Out in 12 overs

The Wombats arrived around 930 for 10am start but the opposition only had 6 players by 10am and we gave them until 1015am for everyone to arrive which they did. There was a downpour at 6am with the usual “Is the Game On” Line Feed messages. But Ken shut them all up with “100% On as it’s T20 so let’s all get out there after cancelled games”. Also, a massive thumbs up to Malith and Pramond, who were 12th and 13th players during the week but kept themselves available and got a game as Yuz “Mr 140” hurt his ankle and had to call in injured.

We won the toss (with a ten-yen coin rather than the usual Her Majesty’s finest mint), we elected to bat first. Also Dean hurt his back trying to pick up his daughter and wasn’t going to play but he managed to bat and wicket keep for the whole game.

We opened with Achal and Santosh. The day started well, with two wides on Achal and the Wombats on the bench were thinking “yes we can do this in wides”. The Wombats bench was gesturing to Achal “Come on your Roppongi Ladies are Watching” as he is fond of a few beers at the Cayote Ugly Dance Club. He also has a “cool” playing attire as he wears his yellow Wombats baseball cap backwards underneath his helmet. Achal managed to strike one run before going out for an LBW which he though was a little too high. The umpire Rob took what seemed like the length of Max’s Supun’s pre match ritual before giving Achal the one finger out. Enter Adam Birss as number three.

Santosh (supported by his lovely wife and clearly a future Wombat son, who warmed up with us), was on form with the bat, settling in and hitting few knocks and including a great four going to diagonally across Mid On towards the playground in the corner. However, he was bowled out by Rikas for a tally of 12. Adam had a solid game today, settling a few nerves with good run calls and sensible blocks.  He managed to get a few strikes for a tally of four, eventually being caught by Hansny at mid off Sanoos’ bowling.  There was a funny moment when Adam stumbled over the temporary crease in between the overs, while running back and Sanoos completely throwing the ball across the field during his run up (Rob the umpire gave it as no ball).

At this point the Wombats needed a solid mid order as the openers were out. Enter Richard Bracefield the star batsman for the team and we were hoping for his famous big fours and sixes from his immaculate strong biceps. This was not to be as he mishit a bowl off Rikas bowling, skied it to mid wicket.  The first fielder juggled the ball and looked like it was going to be dropped but was caught by Sanoos in the end.  The game could have turned out very different if this ball was dropped.

Enter our new Wombat Satyam (from New Delhi, India and works in Corporate Banking at MUFG. His cricket highlights includes getting half a century after a top order collapse in mid order and winning the game!).  Satyam managed one better than Richard before being bowled out by Sanoos. Ken Oiwa entered the batting, after being given a lesson by Richard how not to put the inner thy pad as a thy pad (actually-Richard was giving Deano how to put his pads on the right was as well). The first bowl, he miscued it and ended up as a “French Cut” to Fine Leg (lucky it did not hit the wicket). Ken did a little nice flick for one before being bowled out by Sanoos for a three. Ken was also hit in the chest from Sanoos bowling – the opposition was nice enough to say “are you ok”.  The artificial pitch really slows the ball so you can miscue it if you attack the ball. Its best to stand back a little and wait for how it bounces.

Enter Adam Cronin (it was two Adams on the crease by then, is it a Wombats first?”). He looked like he was on a good rhythm hitting nice singles and twos before again being bowled out by Rizwan for 6.  The ball actually stuck inside the wicket.  New debutant Fahd (who is from Karachi, Pakistan. His skills are talking shit & picking up ladies and snowboarding) came on the crease. He hit some nice solid blocked shots before being bowled out by Anas. There was also an incident where the bail was broken and it had to be replaced.

Another debutant Pramod (from Madhya Pradesh, India and a financial analyst) gave a really nice four on the mid on and also hit the only six of the Wombats towards deep square, smashing the fence before being bowled out by Anas.  The boundaries were consecutive as well.  Our Innings ended at 12th over when Dean was caught at mid on by Rishad off Rizan bowling. Debutant Malith (from Sri Lanka and software engineer) was not out. Not for the first time, the top scorer was Extras with 14 (then Santosh at 12).

Shonan Innings 57 for 2 in 8 overs

Inspired by Ireland only scoring 36 runs against England, Wombats sensed a slight chance of victory when we took to the field.  The opening bowlers were Achal and Fahd with Achal opening the bowling and the batting.  Achal ended with 20-1 wicket bowling 4 overs and Fahd 14 for 1 wicket.  The two openers were solid – it was a pity that we could not give them a better target to play around with.  The first wicket was from Fahd (and his first wicket for the Wombats), as Rizwan hit a pretty good strike towards Malith at mid on but the catch was equally solid. Congratulations to Malith and Fahd as first catch and wicket for the Wombats. Wonderful to see debutants working well. Achal also got a wicket with an LBW.

Pramod also gave a good spell with the ball with solid pacey balls. He did let a difficult catch drop at the boundary when he was fielding.  Ken made a shocking fielding error, allowing a bouncing ball through his legs for a four, off Pramod’s bowling. Richard and Fahd were warned by Rob, the umpire for shouting “the batsman is getting jittery”.  The main point of Wombats fielding camaraderie is sledging the opposition!  The game ended with a four from Rikas off Adam Cronin’s bowling.

Catches

• Malith catch for Fahd to get his first wicket for the wommies.

Dropped Catches

• Not so much dropped catch but shocking midfield to allow a rolling ball pass thru his legs for a four from Pramod’s bowling.
• Misfield: Kenny wanted to finish the game early to have some beers quickly so he let the ball go to the boundary.

Quotes

• “Is he out?” Astonished Santosh repondingbto another out by Wommies.
• After getting all out on 56, Achal was asking “what is the lowest score on this ground, did we make a new record?.” Then he started searching on Google the lowest score in international cricket, and he got happy since he realized that wombats played better than Zimbabwe (their lowest score was 35 vs Sri Lanka!)
• Ken Oiwa: When talking about his first scoring shot in almost a year (a French cut that squirted down to a vacant fine leg for 2), Kenny called it a “Chinese Cut”. When challenged by a tent of confused Wombats, Kenny backed himself, claiming it was a very “chinky shot” so Chinese Cut was appropriate…

Great Moments in Sport

• Malith’s catch off Fahd bowling – great team effort from Wombats
• Ahmed was bowling with “serious” pace to get his first wicket, then he started bowling consecutive beamers with not so serious pace!

Dummy Spits

• While Wombats settling in the nicely air conditioned bar, Rob from BECC and also our umpire comes in and says “Wombats we need one more player coz we are short” Ken still in his kit as getting in his cycling lycra would be too sexy says “ok I will help you guys out” and necks his pint. Dean shouts “you will get our worst fielder” as Ken misfielded a shocking bouncer through the legs for four and can’t catch. Rob, not sure if he heard Dean, but comes back and says “actually we don’t need you anymore”…. back to drinking and watching Fahd pour foam.

Golden Thong Nominations

• Birss falling over whilst batting just walking across the wicket.
• Captain allowing shonan an extra 10 mins to get there instead of the forefit then getting stuffed.
• Birss was not paying attention to the misfield by a keeper from the non-striker’s end, apparently, he wasn’t believing in taking singles.
• Dean was tired of padding the guys up, as soon as he finishes with one, the next one arrives, he gave up eventually.
• Richie doesn’t really want to share his new bb bat with anyone, but the captain asked and he handover with a “fake” smile.
• Fahd pouring with 99% head 1% foam from a beer jug. Three consecutive times and he couldn’t get it right….. people were saying “come on it’s not that difficult to pour a pint”